Is your marriage in a bad spot? Don’t believe these 5 marriage lies:
- Marriage lies – #1: “It will always be this way, I’ll suffer in my marriage like this for the rest of my life.” (The truth is, a bump in the road doesn’t mean forever, you just don’t hear about the people who stuck with it and made it through, like we did.)
- Marriage lies – #2: “Everything would be better if we were apart.” (The truth is, there would only be a new set of problems, probably much more difficult ones, like dealing with your kids’ broken hearts and all that comes with that especially when they’re teens, or problems with step-kids, or finances, or parenting alone, or how to handle holidays where the kids have to be shuttled around to many different places, etc.)
- Marriage lies – #3: “The kids will be fine.” (The truth is, they’ll never be the same. Remember, your children didn’t ask to be in this situation, their needs come first.)
- Marriage lies – #4: “I deserve better.” (The truth is, you need to keep your vows and things will get better, but first you need to take the focus off yourself. It’s NOT easy, but it’s the path that leads to peace and true freedom in the long run. Put yourself in your spouse’s shoes for a moment, ask yourself, “How fun am I to live with lately?“)
- Marriage lies – #5: “I chose the wrong spouse.” (Maybe so, but I love this quote, “Sometimes you make the right decision, other times you make the decision right.” A vow is a vow, God can bring the love back.)
I know there are always exceptions…
I know how much easier this is to say than to LIVE it, believe me. And yes there are situations of abuse or times when one spouse refuses to change or work on things for years, I get that, but I just want you to know that every time it gets hard it doesn’t mean that it’s over. Hang with it, don’t believe the lies of the world.
DON’T GIVE UP, you can make it!
Read here about when I thought saving our marriage was “IMPOSSIBLE”.
You may think that whatever you’re struggling with is somehow unique and no one has ever had the same issues, but I’ll bet you’d be surprised. E-mail me if you need someone to “talk” to who has been there: Kelly@KellytheKitchenKop.com.
Also, read this post from my other blog about Passion in Marriage, and if you are what is called a “Sex Starved Wife”, be sure to read the comments there. Though not Christian based, Divorce Busting is an invaluable website that I’ve been visiting for years when I want good info to help others (or Kent & I!) through a rough spot in their marriage. (Scroll down at that link to read some great articles by Michele.) Buy the book: Divorce Busting: A Step-by-Step Approach to Making Your Marriage Loving Again or this one: The Sex-Starved Wife: What to Do When He’s Lost Desire.
This next book helps you see what YOU need to do to make things better. (And by the way, trust me, don’t read the part for your spouse, only the part for YOU…) The Hidden Keys of a Loving, Lasting Marriage- Have you seen this post about the movie, Fireproof?
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